Too soon
by alice3897bsc
Summary: AU!Gibbs's life is changed when his wife gives birth to their son prematurely
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS sadly

Leroy Jethro Gibbs sat slumped against the sterile white wall his head in his hands. He couldn't believe what was happening. He had been planning and looking forward to this day for weeks and he knew it was all going to be perfect. He had begun making furniture, carefully piecing together a beautiful crib and cradle made out of the best wood he could find with more love and care than should be possible for the hard as nails marine and he and Shannon had even started picking (and fighting good-naturedly ) over baby names . But it wasn't supposed to be happening now, not yet. It was much, much too early, as Shannon was only 26 weeks pregnant and he knew there were supposed to be several more months of her belly getting steadily bigger along with her ankles and her need to go to the bathroom before their baby was ready to be born. Ready or not though and no matter how wrong it was their baby _his baby_ was entering this unforgiving world now and all he could do was pray JR as they had affectionately name their unborn child had enough strength to survive. JR had to survive, had to. There was no if or buts about it. He didn't think he could survive if his baby died and he knew Shannon wouldn't.

When Shannon had told him on that sweet summers day 5 months ago that she was expecting their baby he was over the moon but he also realised the idea of being a father scared him more than he had ever been before. However the fear he felt now as he realised his baby could very possibly die was so overwhelming it took his breath away. Not only that but the feeling of helplessness that coursed through his body was not helping anything. He wasn't there when Shannon's waters had broken and the only support he had been able to offer his distraught, terrified wife was through his cell phone as she was rushed towards the hospital forced to endure the agonizing contractions ripping through her with nothing more than the paramedics and her husband's voice to anchor her. And now it was happening as he stood outside the surgical delivery room he had been banished from only able to listen to the doctors terse conversation and the various beeps and whirls of medical machines. He wished more than anything in this world that he could be in there with his wife and his soon to be born baby, but no matter how hard the desperate marine had pleaded the doctors had still refused to let him stay and although it tore at his heart and soul Gibbs did as he was told and left the room were his child would soon come into the world to let the doctors work. He had no idea how long he stood there worrying and waiting for someone anyone to tell him what was happening before he heard the voices of the doctors change and the words both devastated and overjoyed him.

"It's a boy" one of them shouted which filled him with unspeakable joy. He couldn't believe it. A son he had a son. Someone he could teach to play ball and give advice about girls to. Someone he could laugh and joke with and teach how to build boats. However the next words the doctors uttered brought all his daydreaming of the future to a grinding Holt and reminded him that nothing in the future of his boy, who he had yet to set eyes on was certain. "He's having difficulty breathing, let's get him to the NICU!" He stumbled backward unable to even begin to process the doctors words before the doors of the delivery room flew open and a team of doctors nurses and a tiny incubator he knew held his baby boy inside tore out, entered the elevator and before he knew it had been whisked away. The rush of adrenaline that had previously surged the new father's body left in a rush leaving him feeling weak and he let his head drop into his hands and began to pray for his baby to stay strong and live.

He was jerked out of his silent thoughts as a nurse tapped him softly on the shoulder. "You can see your wife now" she said, her voice kind and sympathetic and her words made him realise how much he wanted, _needed_ to see Shannon and he jumped to his feet and practically ran to his wife's bedside wiping the sweat soaked hair of her forehead and kissing her head softly.

"Jethro" she whispered exhaustion colouring her voice, along with happiness. "We have a son j a son."

" I know baby I know and I bet he's the most beautiful baby the world has ever seen" , he replied as a brief image of a small boy playing baseball with him, his brown hair slicked back with sweat flew threw his brain showing him what could be in the future.

"Go be with him J, please. I can't bear the thought of him all alone without anyone to protect him" she pleaded devastation coming through clear in her voice.

"But you need -" he began to protest before being cut off by his wife.

"Our son needs you more" she whispered softly. He nodded slowly and called to the nurse still in the room asking if it was okay. she began leading him out of the room where his whole life had just changed after nodding the affirmative. He kissed Shannon's hand tenderly whispered softly that he loved her and began to follow the nurse out of the room only stopping at the door when he heard Shannon call " tell him mommy loves him J, please" he quickly looked back at his wife pride swelling in his chest at the thought of the difficult and incredibly painful labour his wife had gone through to bring their child into the world and nodded his agreement "of course baby". Then he tuned on his heel and made his way down the sterile white hospital corridor-just behind the nurse- towards the elevator that would take him to his son. Nerves and apprehension began to grew in Gibbs mind and gut as the elevator crept closer and closer to the NICU floor coming to a climax as the doors opened slowly and he along with the nurse (who'd quietly informed him her name was Lucy) stepped out onto the corridor which led to the room his son was being cared for. The walk to the NICU seemed achingly long but when at last they reached the entrance and Lucy pushed open the door and beckoned him inside he hesitated to go in, afraid of what the room might hold. He shook of the unwelcome thoughts as quickly as they had arrived and quickly walked inside.

The sights and sounds of the NICU assailed him overwhelming his senses. The beeps and whirs of the monitors were incredibly loud and the rows of tiny incubators that he knew housed even tinier babies filled him with fear. He was beginning to lose his battle with the urge to run from the room when he felt Lucy's hand on his arm guiding him slowly to the bottom incubator on the left side of the room. He closed his fear filled eyes as they reached the incubator that he knew held his boy inside before opening them slowly and blowing out a shaky breath.

He barley registered the soft voice of the nurse stood next to him as he looked past the incubator and instead at the impossibly small baby it housed. Gibbs had no idea how long he stood there in the hospital rooms filled with noise, no idea at all. He didn't notice the nurse moving away from the incubator they both stood at nor did he pay any attention to other parents coming and going in the busy NICU as all his undivided attention was fixated on the most beautiful baby he had ever seen his life, his baby. He barely noticed the countless ivs running in and out of his son's tiny arms or the monitors and wires he was attached to and even the tube protruding out of the baby's mouth seemed to fade away as he stood staring at him his heart filling with love. He was covered in wires from head to toe, so pale his skin was translucent and seemingly small enough to fit in the palm of Gibbs hand but despite all of that Jethro thought he was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. He tentatively put his finger through one of the incubator holes and felt an overwhelming rush of love as his baby; his son grabbed hold with an impossibly small yet perfectly formed hand and gripped on. He smiled softly and dropped his voice low enough for only his boy to hear and whispered softly "Daddy loves you baby" as a lone tear trickled down his cheek.

**TBC…**


	2. Chapter 2

He stood there staring at the baby in front of him drinking in the sight of his_ really_ little boy for what only felt like seconds but in reality was close to an hour before a hand on his arm shook him out of his reprieve.

He turned round ready with his trademark glare to sneer at the person who dared interrupt his time with his son but stopped short as he realised the hand belonged to the wheelchair bound, exhausted but still beautiful form of his wife. "Hey J" she whispered, before he had chance to ask her what she was doing out of bed. "I came to see our baby, so move out the way and let me look." this time she said it with her fake serious voice alerting Gibbs to the fact that he was stood directly in front of the plastic box holding the couples child and therefore blocking his wife's view of the baby. "Oh, sorry Shan" – apologies were never a weakness between him and his wife, "I guess you want to see how beautiful the baby we made is huh?" he joked teasingly before stepping back and allowing his wife the first sight of the tiny yet perfectly formed baby she had given birth to.

He watch her as she looked at the baby and pondered how his always immaculately dressed wife had never looked more beautiful than at that moment with her mused her and crumpled hospital gown she set eyes on her baby. Her eyes filled with tears and she reached out a trembling hand to touch the baby who had begun to move restlessly inside his prison calming him the moment they touched. "Hey little one" she almost – but not quite- cooed leaving him feeling almost like an intruder on the private so very intimate moment between mother and son. He almost stepped away but Shannon's hand settling in his grounded him in front of the incubator. "Mommy and daddy are here now baby, so you just keep fighting" She told the baby in a stern yet motherly tone as she and her husband held hands in front of his bed and prayed that their baby was strong enough to do just that.

_One week later_

"Come on Gibbs"` Shannon said exasperated, using his last name that she now shared as she always did when she was annoyed with him " We have to think of a name eventually, he's a week old already and his in incubater _still _says baby boy Gibbs. It's getting cruel."

"I know, I know" he answered with a sigh "but nothing sounds right, and it's just I want it to be perfect." Nothing he could think was good enough, special enough for his boy. His sons' name couldn't just be nice, it had to be _special._

"What about, what about Anthony" she questioned tentatively, unsure how the suggestion would go down with her husband.

"Anthony" he mused, his mind flashing back to the other Anthony he had once known. His grandfather. They had been so close he and his pops and as he remembered the brave, funny, generous man he had known in the past he couldn't help but imagine the brave, funny man his son could be in the future. "It's perfect" he whispered gazing into Shannon's eyes his voice full of emotion before drawing his wife into a hug and holding her close.

_Two months later_

The journey from that day had been along hard one with the good days coming few and far between and the horrible heart breaking moments seeming to come 10 times as much. It seemed that whatever could go wrong with his baby had done; from a very severe chest infection leaving him barely hanging on to his fragile grip on life to a fever induced seizure That Gibbs had been present to witness. God it had been horrific Jethro remembered as he had been able to do nothing but stand back and watch his tiny fragile son shake and be injected with medications left and right before going disturbingly limp. That day still haunted his nightmares but Jethro couldn't help but feel that no matter how bad the 2 months since his son had come bursting into his life had been the best of his life, and today the day he had been waiting for since the day his boy had been born 64 days ago had come.

Today he was finally going to be able to hold his son in his arms without the baby being connected to the breathing machine Gibbs loved and loathed in equal measure. Loved because it and the other machines his son relied on had kept him alive all these weeks and loathed because it was a constant reminder that his son wasn't healthy and it tarnished even the most perfect moments he had with his son, like the first time he had held his son ever with a sting of hurt. But today, today, it would just be him and his son and all the other machines and doctors and nurses could fade away to nothing.

However as Gibbs stepped into the hospital elevator alone- Shannon had gone home to sleep after spending the night by their babies cot (cot now, the incubator was finally gone) he couldn't help the twinge of nerves in his stomach. They had attempted this before and it hadn't worked. He had been there last week as his sons attending doctor (Dr stone) had removed the ventilator and could still remember the thrill of fear he felt as his stubborn son - he must get that from Shannon- had refused to breathe despite him doing fine when the doctors practiced turning the ventilator setting way down and had begun to turn blue leaving the doctor no choice to put him back on the machine.

He was shaken out of his thoughts as the elevator opened at the NICU floor (floor 8) and he smiled quietly as he heard a baby's cry realising that today he might finally hear his sons. Although the tough marine would never admit it he almost skipped over to the open cot that was his sons new home, before glancing round in fear when he realised his son wasn't in it. All sorts of terrible thoughts began whirling in his heads, what if his son had taken a turn for the worst, what if someone had kidnapped him! He turned and was about to shout for the nurse that usually looked after his son (Geoff) when that very same man put a comforting arm on his shoulder "Relax man" he soothed, "I've got mini Gibbs right here and he's just fine" he comforted, almost laughing at the relieved face on Jethro. It was then that Gibb's noticed his now not so tiny baby (he was 5 pounds now!) cradled more gently than should be possible but always was in the giant nurses arms. "Ready to hold him Daddy?" Geoff teased cheekily and at his emphatic nod he continued "well go sit in the chair then!

And Gibbs immediately complied almost running to the rocking chair in the corner of the room- thinking as he sat in it that he really had to make one for his sons still not finished nursery – Shannon hadn't wanted to jinx anything and refused to let him decorate until they were positive their baby would be fine. But now he really should crack on with it, it couldn't be too much longer till they got to take him home could it he thought.

He shook his head and returned his thoughts and focus to his baby, his tony (Anthony was a bit too big for a baby his son's size) who had just been placed in his arms. And once he was focused on him nothing could tear his attention away. His blue eyes, shining with love locked on his son's deep green and he felt the unconditional love he had almost become accustomed to since his son had been born flow through him. He continued to stare mesmerized at his son and began to rock slowly as his eyes followed down the babys face looking, committing to memory and simultaneously falling in love with ever mark, crease and freckle of his sons face especially his rosebud mouth now free from tubing which he had never properly seen before. And as the marine turned father slowly rocked his son to sleep he couldn't recall a time were he had ever felt more proud of his son who continued to breathe perfectly the moniter he was attached to showing this time the baby was doing fine with just his lungs to rely on. He almost couldn't believe the baby he held in his arms now was his, he was just too beautiful and as he rocked the finest creation he had ever made in his arms he couldn't remember ever feeling happier or more in love.

TBC

AN: I'm sorry for the wait hopefully the next chapter will be quicker. Please read and review. I would love your opinion, and ideas on how to continue. Should I jump to tony as a child or continue him as a baby? Thanks x


	3. Chapter 3

_A few weeks later_

The day had come, the day had finally come. He had been waiting for this day for not only the 14 weeks since his son's birth but also since the day 32 weeks ago when Shannon had told him she was expecting their first child. Her due date. And it was going to be a day full of joy even if not under the same circumstances they originally expected, because even though it was 14 weeks too late to be the day their baby came into the world it was the day his and Shannon's child Anthony Ryan Gibbs would leave the Washington hospital he had been born in 87 days ago for the first time and enter the home were Jethro hoped he would grow up, And he could not wait. The 26 year old marine felt almost giddy with excitement and was as happy as a kid in a candy store because tonight his baby could sleep in the beautiful handcrafted cot he had lovingly made for him instead of the mass produced plastic hospital cot he was used to, and tonight Tony could fall asleep to the noise of nursery rhymes on his mobile and not bleeping machines and doctors and nurses and finally, finally Gibbs could sit by his son and watch him sleep all night if he wanted and not have to adhere to hospital policy which made him be forced to leave the NICU and his son at 10pm. He jumped softly as he felt Shannon's hand on his – why was she the only person who could creep up on him? - "Are you ready to go J" she whispered softly and at his nod she led them over to the door of the room they stood in pausing only as Jethro turned to inspect the room, his favourite room in the house, their sons room. He was proud of this room that he had painstakingly decorated late at night when the only thing on his mind was his little boy lying in a cot 20 miles away from him and his comfort and so to keep the mind of the fact he could not be there to rock his son when he cried at night, or soothe him back to sleep when he woke he carefully pieced together this room. Everything from the soft green paint on the walls to the homemade rocking chair in the corner had been done by Jethro himself in preparation for his boy's homecoming and now the only thing missing was the boy itself although not for long. As the pair turned back around and exited the room Gibbs could be fully complete

_1 hour later_

The NICU was decorated brightly with streamers and balloons, and even a banner transforming both the nurses' station and Tony's crib, from cold and sterile to warm and welcoming when Shannon and Jethro entered the room and the couple couldn't help but be amazed at the amount of people there celebrating their sons homecoming with them. Before he had ever experienced being a NICU parent Gibbs knew if he had heard of this going home party tradition he would have scoffed at it, sure that it was merely an attempt to gain publicity for the hospital but now after his own family's experience with the NICU and the numerous other parties he had witnessed he knew they were much more meaningful than that and, as he saw all the nurses – included Tony's primary nurse who had come in specially on her day off- doctors and even other parents lining the room and celebrating with them how far his son had come he couldn't help but feel overwhelming gratitude and he knew Shannon felt the same as she squeezed his hand softly " Thank you so much" they both said in unison, before Shannon, with tears in her brightly shining eyes was pulled into a hug by another mom Sarah whose son Jamie was in the cot next to Tony's and had become the couples close friend as the rejoiced together. Jethro took this as his cue to walk over to Tony's now open air cot. "Hi buddy" he cried softly, happiness filling him when the baby who was no longer attached to a single machine or piece of equipment immediately turned toward the sound of his voice. Tony knew both him and Shannon specifically by now and he cooed softly as the man reach out and gently cradled him in his arms. "Are you ready to go home?" he queried to the boy as he looked him over. The baby was still small, and weighed about the same as a new-born even though he was now more than 3 months old. Despite this Gibbs was hopeful that the residual effects from his boys prematurity would be minimal. The baby could now suck, swallow, eat and breathe normally, and the only after effect the doctor had seriously warned them about was his eyesight. However Jethro could not find it in him to worry too much about this as it seemed Tony was able to track objects and even if it was effected it was nothing in terms of what side effects he could have had as the doctors had almost guaranteed the couple the baby boy would be left with little to no neurological damage, which made Jethro feel lucky beyond measure.

At that moment Shannon came along beside him and he carefully passed their son to her before getting out his camera and snapping a picture of the mother and son, merely laughing when his wife scowled at him playfully. Seconds later however the woman was cooing over the baby as he reached out and grabbed a stray piece of his mother's hair, tugging surprisingly hard. " You've got quite a grip their baby" the woman cried laughing at Tony's puzzled expression " I can see a sporting career in your path" she joked, smiling once more as the baby snuggled into her seemingly agreeing with her opinion.

Their sons neonatologist suddenly approached them with a huge grin on his face " Congratulations" he cried "I'm so happy for you" and the Gibbs couple responded immediately with an emphatic " Thank you!" towards the man who was responsible for their son being alive today. Seconds later Shannon reached out and hugged the man tightly and Gibbs shook his hand to express just how much he had done for them. The other well-wishers took this as an opportunity and soon the family were being hugged and congratulated by everyone in sight.

These antics continued for more than an hour before the Gibb's departed from the hospital that saved their sons life for hopefully the last time. And as Shannon ever so carefully placed the baby in the safest – and most expensive- car seat possible to buy that the over protective father had spent literally hours Gibbs looked softly at the pair through the rear-view mirror and smiled softly feeling like his life couldn't get any more perfect

_That night_

Gibbs and Shannon were led in bed later that same amazingly perfect day and as Gibbs smelled his sons baby smell in his wife's hair he couldn't help but whisper "thank you shan, thank you so much" in her ear. Smiling softly as she whispered back "what for?" Jethro thought about all of the things he had his wife to thank for, true love, happiness, her strength and their beautiful, perfect son that he was convinced must be all Shannon and none of him to come out so amazing he replied lovingly"for letting me love you" before pulling her closer as he rejoiced in the most perfect thing he had ever made, his family.

**An: Thank you so much for the reviews I really appreciate them. I am going to start with bigger age gaps now and the next chapter should be about one of Tony's big milestones, either first words or first steps. Please R and R **


	4. Chapter 4

Gibbs was tired, terribly bone achingly tired. He had had no idea how hard having a newborn baby was when he brought Tony home from the hospital as although he had been a dad- he still couldn't get over that, him a dad- for over 3 months it was only in the past week he and shannon had actually had there son at home with them. Therefore it was only now he was realising newborns were much harder work than he had anticipated, although they were also much more rewarding . And although the exhaustion he was feeling was massive he wouldn't change the fact that it was him and Shannon waking with their baby and not some name less faceless Dr for the world. This however didn't change the fact that Tony had woken up every other hour on the dot throughout each and every night he had been home, wanting to be fed, changed or sometimes just held. This meant he and Shannon had taken turns in getting up with him and soothing him until he fell into slumber again causing them to both feel like zombies.

Getting up with the baby was exactly what he was doing at the moment as he sat in the rocking chair in the corner of the tiny but beautifully decorated room, holding his wide awake baby. The ship covered onesie the boy was wearing making him look if possible, even cuter. Jethro continued to rock hoping the baby would fall to sleep but his efforts proved futile. It seemed, that no matter how long he rocked the baby he just wouldn't go to sleep. In his desperation he had even resorted to singing his boy to sleep, although from the way Tony's face had screwed up at his old mans rendition of 'twinkle twinkle little star' it was clear the elder gibbs talents didn't lie in singing. And so Gibbs was at a loss of what to do.

"Okay then tony" he whispered to his son softly, being carful not to disturb his sleeping wife in the bedroom next door, " it appears you got my stubborn streak" he continued laughing as the baby appeared to hang on his every word. " Now I know why my dad always complained about me" he joked to his son stroking his soft brown hair gently. His mind flashing back to the day that the two most important men in his life had met. His father and his son.

_1 month earlier_

Shannon sat next to her sons cot in the NICU step down unit ( a quieter more private area of the NICU floor, were the babies well enough not to need intensive care but still not ready to go home were kept) playing with his tiny hands and even smaller feet, smiling at every gurgle the boy made and just soaking up the rare alone time she had with her beautiful baby. She knew she was biased on that but who could not love that tuft of dark hair and big green eyes? And the nurses had complimented her on his beauty hundreds of times so she knew it wasn't all in her head! The woman thought to herself. The reason she was visiting her still tiny but perfect miracle alone this morning was because Jethro had gone to the Washington Dc airport that morning. He had gone to pick up his father, Tonys grandfather from the plane he had caught from Stillwater early in the morning to see his knew and only grandchild. Shannon was beyond excited to see the elderly man as she loved Jackson as a second father and knew he would make an amazing Grandpa. Unfortunatley the older man had not yet been able to visit the new baby even though he had desperately wanted to. Hospital rules stipulated that until the babies in the NICU were moved into the stepdown unit the only visitors allowed were their parents and thus this was the first opportunity Jackson and Anthony Gibbs had to meet. Despite this the proud parents had sent him numoures pictures of the boy so he had managed to see the baby and his first 2 months of life even if not in person, although all this was about to change.

_Dc airport_

Jethro Gibbs stood outside the arrival terminal for his fathers flight impatiently, shifting repeatedly from one leg to the other. He was impatient for two reasons, for one he was excited to see his father and show him his pride and joy as even though he and his father didn't always get on he knew without a doubt that he loved him and he had missed his presence in his life. The other reason was that he was away from Tony, or 'Spud' as he had affectionately named him during the time that he was allowed to visit him and so he was desperate to get back to his bed ( or cot) side. Although he knew the time for Shannon to be alone with Tony was very important for both mother and baby. Gibbs was so caught up in his thoughts that he almost missed the tannoy annoncment making him aware of his fathers flights arrival and he raised his head just in time to see his old but full of life father walking to words him.

" Dad" he cried before embracing the man in a quick hug " how are you?"

" Good to see you son " the elder Gibbs man replied " I'm very excited to meet my Grandson, and if the pictures are anything to go by you've got quite a looker there Jethro!" The man continued as the pair walked as quickly as his age would allow to the baggage claim.

"That he is dad, that he is" Gibbs agreed with fatherly pride in his voice thinking of the dark hair his son had inherited from him and his sparkling green eyes and button nose from his mother. Before reaching out and grabbing the plaid patterned suitcase his father pointed out on the baggage carousel and steering both himself and his father to his car. He had recently replaced his nice but not at all family friendly car with a practical and sturdy pickup truck when Shannon had informed him of her pregnancy.

The pair talked on the way back to the hospital the underlying awkwardness between the men forgotten in their excitement to see the youngest member of their family. Jethro couldn't help but be amazed once again about how such a small baby could change so much as he realised things had never been so comfortable between he and his father since his mothers death more than a decade before. He brought his father up to date with Tony's recent medical progress as he drove, almost brimming with both pride and excitement that Tony had finnially begun bottle feeding and yesterday he had even given him a bottle himself! His father listened eargly and before he realised it he was pulling into his now normal space in the hospital carpark and leading his father inside.

"Do you wanna go grab a coffee, before we go see the baby Dad?" Gibbs questioned although secretly hoping his father would decline.

"Nonsense Leroy" his father exclaimed "I didn't come all this way for coffee, I came to see my grandson! So lead the way."

Jethro smiled as he and Jackson entered the elevator and he led his father over to the NICU room were his baby boy was situated. " Are you coming in Dad?" he questioned before entering the room and making his way through the numerous cots and over to his wifes side. Gibbs smiled at the love he saw shining in her eyes as she cradled their child in her arms, singing to him softly, completely unaware of his presence. "Hey baby" he called softly pressing a kiss to her lips and then one to Tonys forehead smiling as he giggled and grabbed his finger in a surprisingly strong grip. The father then glanced up and saw his father still standing in the hospital doorway a look of joy on his face. The elderly man then began to make his way over to the trio before glancing at the baby in his daughter in laws arms and exclaiming " oh he is so beautiful" before placing a work calloused but still gentle hand on the boys tiny one. The young couple smiled at the look of wonder on his face as Shannon asked him " Would you like to hold him?"

"Damn right I would" Jackson replied, carefully scooping up the blanket wrapped baby who although he was still tiny and covered in bandages and an iv was to him the most amazing thing he had ever seen, or held. And as the boys eyes fluttered open and his tiny fist grabbed his rapidly thinning hair he knew that a very special bond had just formed. One between a Grandfather and Grandson that could never be broken.

_Present_

" Is that all it was gonna take Tony" Gibbs laughed as he realised that his storytelling had finially lulled the baby into slumber and he was snuggled into his arms the occasional baby snore the only sound he was making. The man knew he should put the baby back in the crib and catch a few hours of much need sleep while he had the chance but he was loathe to do so, and instead he got more comfortable in his chair and continued to stare at Tony, imagining all the other moments his baby boy and old man would have together.

**AN: Sorry for the wait, but the next chapter is pretty planned out and should be up in the next couple of weeks. Thank you all so much for your reviews and alerts they really mean the word to this first time author, so please R and R**


	5. Chapter 5

Gibbs was beginning to get worried. Very worried, although he knew most of that worry was unfounded. The feeling was strange and unusual for him as the marine was usually stoic and unused to feeling such strong emotions, or at leastl he used to be, until 1.5 years ago when the object of the large majority of his worry was born. His son. That was now one of the main emotions Jethro felt, when thinking of his son. Although of course the very main emotion he felt towads his baby was love, overwhelming unconditional love that often threatened to burst his heart at any moment whenever he looked into the sparkling glee filled eyes of his son, but worry was right up there too. After all his boy did get in more than a few situations that caused worry to spike through his heart. First it had been worry over whether his boy would even survive, as he clung perilously to life. Then he worried constantly if his son was safe when they brought him home. Terrified that he would turn his back and Tony would be gone. And then it had been the unexpectadley high fever Tony had spiked at 6 months – when he and Shannon had been on their first date night since he had been born of course. It had turned out to be nothing more than a cold, but it still left both the young parents with more than a little fear for their childs health. And, now the father was worried about Tony's development, due to the fact he still hadn't started walking yet and he was almost 18 months old. He knew the boy was way past the normal start age (per the many parenting and child development books he had read) and no matter how many times the man was reassured by his sons Dr that slightly slow development was a side effect of his prematurity he was still terrified that his sons late walking would mean he may have more serious developmental delays. In his mind Tony had already suffered enough and he couldn't stand the thought of his son having even more difficulties in his life although he knew nothing could ever change the way he felt about the boy. It wouldn't be the only complication of his little boys dramatic early arrival either , as Tony suffered with what looked like athsma ( although it was too early for a conclusive diagnosis) as a result along with both nut and egg allergies. He was just beginning to run all the worst case scenarios of Tony's health in his mind ( a pessimistic habit he had always had and that Shannon had always hated as it contradicted her more sunny optimistic nature), when a soft cry from his boys nursery startled him from his increasingly darkening thoughts.

He smiled softly before making his way from the cosy living room couch to the room were the sound was coming from- his sons room. He knew exactly what this specific cry meant, having become very used to Tonys various sobs, easily being able to differenterate his tired, hungry and needing a diaper change crys, and this one was definitely a cry demanding feeding. That was the one both him and Shannon were most used to as it seemed the baby was constantly hungry, wanting feeding even in the night still even though it was a habit most babies his age had long since grown out of. Neither of the couple was complaining however at the late night awakenings (well not too much) as his constant eating meant tony was gradually beginning to creep up on his peers in size. Although the boy was still in 9-12 month clothing and by far the smallest in the mother and tot group he and Shannon (and sometimes even Gibbs) went to, the difference was becoming less and less obvious. He only hoped the boy would grow out of the habit by the time he was a teenager or he would eat his parents out of house and home. Gibbs entered the Childs room pausing to look at the pitiful frown on his sons face, greeting it with a happy smile before reaching into the crib and lifting his son out. His heart warming at the smile that appeared on his sons face as he saw his daddy. "Da, Da" the baby cooed, the sweet words filling the marine with love as it always did since the day 2 months ago when tony had firstr uttered them. His mind immediately jumping back to that day.

2 months earlier

Gibbs smiled as he felt Shannons hand tighten around his as they sat in the mopvie theatre together, on a date for only the second time since Tony's birth, the first ending in tony being rushed to the hospital as his fever spiked to 104 degrees. He shook the unwelcome memories from his mind and focused back on the film playing out in front of them. They were watching; paranormal activity per Shannons request, although he had no idea why she always chose horrors as she always ended up scared stiff and swearing she would never watch another scary film again (a vow that never lasted as she could never resist the newest and scariest film on the market). Maybe the terrified state she was in was a good thing though this time he mused as it certainly took their child who that they had left at home that night of her mind. And although he was in the safe care of his granddaddy (and second favourite man on the planet) he knew Shan was more than a little worried about leaving him with him having to practically drag her away from the child a couple of hours before. Not without good reason though as although gibbs worked and had therefore been away from the boy many times already, Shannon left him much less frequently and thus she was very anxious. Though she had now finally begun to relax and enjoy the film. Before he realised it his daydreaming meant that he missed most of the film only becoming aware of his surroung again when the films credits began to roll and the crowd of people in the cinema began to disperse to the cold night outside. He nodded eagerly at his wifes suggestion of dinner at the local pizza parlour (which was his favourite place to eat) and linked hands with hers inside the booth, thoughts of anything other than each other the furthest thing from either of their minds.

When they arrived home 2 hours later after a delicious meal (pasta carbonara for him and a sausage onion and extra cheese pizza for Shan) they were greeted at the door by his old man and a giggly smiley baby. "What are you still doing up baby" the mother asked the baby taking him from his granddads arms. "Well the little tyke has something to show you don't you" the elder man said smiling at Tony. Who then laughed as if he understood what was going on before reaching out towards Gibbs and shouting the words he had been waiting to hear nice his son started saying mama 3 weeks prior. "Dada" the baby giggled before being scooped into Gibbs arms and hugged mercilessly. "Yeah that's right, "Gibbs whispered, "I am your daddy".

Present

The happy thoughts of that day cheered the marine up significantly and as he fed the baby in his arms he realised that worrying over what might happen to Tony in the future was a stupid waste of his energy. Instead he should be focusing on what his baby could do and not what he couldn't. With that on his mind he grabbed the young boy and began making his way down the steps that led to his basement – and his latest project. The basement housed the bare bones of the boat he had just begun to build and he laughed at the babies excitement at seeing what was basically just a piece of wood at the moment. He placed the baby on his workbench a careful distance from any dangers and housed safely in his bouncy seat and smiled as he began to sand the wood with careful deliberate strokes. He was certain he would spend many more days down here with nothing but the boat and his son for company ( and hopefully in the future a couple more children too) and he grinned at the thought. He knew the boat, his son and hopefully his family would grow together throughout the next few months and years and he again criticized himself for his earlier dark thoughts. He should have known by now his son never did anything by the normal or usual schedule – his early birth the prime example- and wasting time dwelling on this was a waste of the time he could spend making memories with tony and Shannon. He was sure the boy would get there in the end anyway and if he didn't Jethro would still love him with all of his heart anyway.

TBC

AN I am so sorry for such a long gap between updates ( a combination of writers block and a lot of GCSE exams) but I am now on a six week holiday from school and so should have a large amount of time to right.. please read and review and feel free to leave any suggestions of future chapters ( this would be greatly appreciated). Hope you enjoy!


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